Sandeep Singh- Talking out of his ass-

I guess it started from this blog only when I felt a whole new dimension of feelings that I had never felt before. Maybe nobody read it, or thought upon it or gave it anything more than rash skims. But I still felt it all. Sometimes as slowly as you barely feel it and sometimes so quickly that you feel so much all of a sudden in a few emotional seconds. I am not lost. I am not gone. I am not dead. Not even close to having a suicidal intention. I am alive. I am in pain. And I am not leaving this blog which I should have erased a long time ago. I am nobody. But the energy this text is containing in itself, is not nothing.

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I am self centered
I need mothers all around me to hold me each time before lightening strikes
I want to be pampered, almost always
I want to discussed my career, when I am low
I am low almost always
I learn what others teach me
I adapt what I like and love feeling things in their right forms
I also don't let people around get through me
I complain people don't know me
I joke too much when I am sad
I talk too much when I am happy
I am complex
I am least helpful in taking what I seek but most particular about stating what more others should give me
I am relaxed at the most wrong times
I am hyper when I am overjoyed
I hate things to gain control of themselves
I am obsessed with comfort and rest
I am frustrated when I must repeat


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I had given up writing for myself. But I am back to where I started from. I am helpless. I lack growth and the basic tendency to see past things and make a way without help.

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It's 1:50 AM and this is how I describe myself.